Introduction to the Sermon and the Commandment

Once again, a good morning to all of you. Thank you for joining us in our first English worship service. We are doing a series within a series. We are going through the series of the 10 Commandments, but this series of 10 Commandments is really within the broader series of going through the book of Deuteronomy. And as a church, we are also on a larger series, which is to go through the Bible in an alternating fashion, sometimes the Old Testament, then the other times the New Testament, and then we’re back to the Old Testament. So, this is where we are if you’re new with us for the first time.

We are coming to this subject or this commandment on “You shall not commit adultery.” A story is told of a guest preacher in a new church. He was going to preach a sermon, invited there, he doesn’t know the people. The song leader for that day has not communicated with the preacher, so he doesn’t know what the preacher is going to preach about. He has to still choose a closing song, nonetheless. So, the day itself, the preacher announced his sermon topic. He preached about sex and adultery, and when it was time for the song leader to lead in a closing song, he was somewhat embarrassed, because the song choice that night was, “Oh, why not tonight.”

When we deal with a subject of sex and adultery, it’s always sensitive. It’s always a little bit awkward, because there is guilt and shame and fear when it comes to a subject like this. But at the very same time, we must not skirt around this issue, because it is a very crucial issue in our sex saturated world today. I don’t think there is someone who is spared from this problem. We read about the news and in the media and how reports tell us that adultery is a serious problem. Now in Singapore, it is very largely under reported. But overseas, you will know that this is a significant problem that has caused the loss of marriages, the ruining of lives and the breaking down of society. A report in 2016 tells us, according to lawyers, this is not what is seen in official statistics, that 50% of cases of adultery now involve cheating wives. We used to think this is only a man’s problem, but I don’t think this is absolutely true anymore,

The Prevalence and Impact of Adultery

Not just adultery, but views about sex and gender has also changed over time. Just this year, IPS study shows that Singaporeans are now having more liberalized views about gay sex and pre-marital sex. So even in our society, in our country, views about sexuality has really evolved and changed. This is not just a problem for adults.

Sex and adultery and immorality is also a problem for young people. A study was done to show that nine out of 10 boys Imagine your kids. Nine out of 10 boys under the age of 15 have been exposed to pornography. Now this was a study that was done in 2016 This is nine years later. I cannot imagine the numbers going down with smartphones and devices being more available. I think it can only go up. And as a result of pornography, this wide accessibility and availability, we also see that more youths are arrested for sexual crimes. This was a Straits Times report in 2024 and according to MHA (Ministry of Home Affairs), they conclude that being exposed to such material, or pornographic material online, was one reason for young people aged 19 and below committing sex offenses. How severe or how large is this problem of online sexual materials or pornography?

According to a survey, this is from Josh McDowell. This is the porn industry today. It’s 2.3 billion people. and this is the figure in 2019. Six years on, I guarantee you the number of pages is a lot more. In the same conference in 2019 held here in Singapore, the CEO of Focus on the Family then. She said that in Singapore, 51% of Christian, so now I’m shifting not just to the youth, but I’m talking about people in the church. You might think that they are immunized or protected from such things. No, 51% of Christian youth and young adults have viewed pornography at least once in the past year, and if you look at the charts, how prevalent is pornographic use in the Singapore church, these are figures based on 2016 to 2018 by Focus on the Family. And You have the figures between the men and the women and the frequency with which they have viewed pornography.

The Role of Pornography in Society and the Church

So significant problems in the church would involve things, as you could see right here. Josh McDowell, he asked and answered this question, “Why is porn so impactful today?” Very much GLCC style, he said, “…it’s available, accessible, affordable, anonymous, appealing, aggressive and addictive.” He’s absolutely spot on.

Chuck Swindoll, a preacher, a pastor in the States. These are figures long time ago, all right, but he said this, things which I think are sobering, “The most recent studies available suggest that one out of every two people, that’s 50% of the people sitting in our pews…”, 50% of us here “…are looking at and or could be addicted, not just looking at but addicted to internet pornography.” This is a figure at least a decade ago. “Truth be told, that statistic could be even higher…Stop and imagine the ugly but very real possibility of some of your own elders and deacons leaving your meetings and going home (after the service, after a sermon like this) to serve porn. It’s ruining marriages, destroying relationships, harming youth and hurting the body of Christ. You hardly need to be reminded that fallen pastors…did not suddenly fall. More often than not, pornography played a role in their downward spiral.” And so, in our recent times, we hear about pastors who have been well regarded in time past, falling from ministry and from grace.

I think sex, sexuality and sexual sins. These things are like a tsunami wave that has swept over the whole world. We are in a sex saturated and sex crazy world. It is so available, it is so rampant, it is so hidden, and nobody wants to talk about it because it’s awkward, it’s sensitive and it’s difficult to say in the public, like as in a Sunday service. But that is exactly why we need to look at it.

The Commandment as a Protection for Marriage

Commandment number seven is what God has told us, “You shall not commit adultery.”  A serious problem today. For this commandment, I like to say three things, three important things. The first thing I’d like us to know is that this is a law, a commandment given for our good. It is a commandment for our protection. Because a lot of times when we look at the 10 Commandments, we think of them as being restrictive. We think of them as God being a kill joy, he just doesn’t want to enjoy life. He’s always telling us not to do this, not to do that. He is such a wet blanket. But no, we really need to understand that this is a gracious, good command from God to protect us.

To protect what, you say. To protect this, Genesis 2:24: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and they shall become one flesh.” The reason why this commandment is so important is because God has given us something very precious. Right in the Garden of Eden, God said it is not good for man to be alone, I have made for him a helper, a help mate. And God has blessed Adam with marriage. It is supposed to be a very beautiful thing, and it must be protected. It must not be molested, pardon the pun. But it must be protected at all costs. A marriage ordained by God in the Garden of Eden, is to be, between a man and his wife, as we often say here, is between Adam and Eve, and not Adam and Steve. One man, one woman, one lifetime. Not between a man and a man or woman and a woman. And this marriage is to express deep intimacy and union as seen in this phrase, one flesh. Now this one flesh refers to the union between a man and a woman in all areas. Spiritually, socially, emotionally and also physically.

It also refers to that sexual union. First Corinthians six would tell us this is also to be understood in that sexual union. So, sex is part of what it means to be joined as one, to be with one or as one with your spouse, it’s profound, it’s deep. It’s not just sex, but it involves sex. It’s about everything, and God is all out to protect this union. So, Deuteronomy 5 and Exodus 20, which gives us the 10 Commandments, they are given to protect this blessed relationship. Sex is not just physical enjoyment, it’s an expression of intimacy and generosity and joy that is to be enjoyed in your marriage, nothing else, nowhere else. So, these two words in a Hebrew is what this commandment is all about. I said last week, “Thou shalt not kill” is the shortest commandment in English, but in the Hebrew, this is the shortest because it’s literally two words, “lo’ na’ap”, which is “never adultery”, breaking of a marriage covenant by your sexual infidelity or unfaithfulness.

So, God says, protect your marriage. This is my blessing, my gift to you. Don’t let it be destroyed. No adultery, and that would mean all kinds of sexual sins. For example, no premarital sex, because sex is to be enjoyed only in the confines and the blessedness and the security and the commitment of a marriage relationship. And if you have a relationship with someone who is not your spouse, you will be robbing that intimacy that you will enjoy with your future spouse. It is also clearly prohibiting prostitution. The Bible forbids that clearly. It’s also against homosexual sex, as I was hinting Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. But I know in our climate today, there are people who question this position that the Bible gives. God made me this way. I am naturally attracted to someone of the same gender. Well, just because you have same sex attraction doesn’t mean that you can indulge in a sexual relationship like this. It is still wrong, and there are good Christian people who restrain and deny these urges for the sake of Christ, to keep themselves pure. Because the Bible is unequivocal about homosexual sex as sin. Leviticus 18:22 tells us, “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination. Romans 1:26-27 tells us, amongst all dishonorable passions, it involves women exchanging natural relationships or relations for those that are contrary to nature. So instead of women with men, they do it with women, just as “…men likewise give up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another; man committing shameless acts with men…” The Bible is clear. First Corinthians 6:9 “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?” Involves “…sexually immoral, …adulterers” and “men who practise homosexuality?”

So, it also involves rape. I don’t think I need to prove that to you from the biblical scripture and bestiality. You say, what is this? This is lying with any animal, whether you are male or female. That is perversion, that is unclean. And lastly, you may not maybe realize this, but I think it is also true. Polygamy is forbidden. You say, What about Abraham? What about the many men in the Bible, David, who had many wives? Solomon? Well, I think polygamy is not God’s will. It might have been tolerated, but it is not the ideal. Far from it, because the ideal is already set in the Garden of Eden, one man, one woman, one lifetime. That is God’s will. So, “You shall not commit adultery”, protects against these sins that would ruin a healthy, holy, intimate, godly marriage. So, if this is the picture I’d like to paint for you, it is this. At the heart of it all is God’s blessed will for a blessed marriage, one man, one woman, one lifetime. Why does God give the commandment not that he wants to be a kill joy or he wants to be a wet blanket. He doesn’t want you to enjoy but he wants to protect this ultimate thing of your marriage. He wants you to enjoy marriage, enjoy your spouse, and in order to do that, it has to guard against all these other attacks: pre-marital, sex, homosexuality, polygamy, this is God’s will.

Now, just in case we think these are the only things God has for us to protect from, we must remember what Jesus said. Jesus said, [Matthew 5:27-28] “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ Now this is similar to last Sunday’s sermon. I hope you remember this is level one sin. What is level one sin? Physical acts? Then he graduates us to level two sins. Level two sins are not just physical acts. They are mental acts. So, he says, “But I say to you that…” He’s lifting us to level two, and level two says “Everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Now, this is very graphic. He’s telling us adultery is not just in the bed, but it’s in the head when someone mentally rapes another, when someone in his mind undresses another, when someone in his mind is fulfilling his sexual fantasies. Now let’s be clear. Here, this is not saying you cannot look at a woman. I mean tiala, if cannot look at a woman or you cannot look at a man, but it is to look at a woman with lustful intent. With the desire, with the goal to fulfill your sexual urges and desires.

So, it is often said, it’s not the first look, but it’s the second look. It’s not the glance, but the gaze, because that’s where you are lured, and that’s where your mind takes you to where you should not go.

So, Jesus is telling us that we sin not just when we go to a hotel or to the bed, but we sin all the time when we look at someone with this desire and this urge to fulfill it. “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality…” [Matthew 15:19]. So, the real source of all those sins is right here. [Pointing to the heart] Temptations may abound, but it’s that lust within that latches on to these deep temptations.

By the way, I shared with you last week, level two is in a head, remember, and we had two, A, B, C, D, and D is not just about my heart my head, but someone else’s. So, if I were to apply that same equivalence here, then it also means not only must I be careful not to have those thoughts and to fulfill those desires by looking at people, I must also not be the cause for someone else to lust. Now, sometimes, if you are very handsome or if you are very beautiful, sorry, too bad. No choice, but it, I think, beholds us to dress modestly and act modestly, appropriately and not be dressed in a scandalous way or flirtatious way or behave in such a way. I think that is what it means to not cause someone else to stumble. It is what it means to love my brother and not cause them to sin. I think that’s all part of level two, not sinning in my head, nor causing someone to sin in their head.

But let’s come back to what we are trying to protect. We are trying to protect the joy, the blessedness, the beauty of marriage and this commandment is like a fence that wards against all these sins in physical form and all these sins also in mental forms. It involves pornography. It erodes your marriage. You watch porn, you get addicted to it, you will begin objectifying your wife. You will begin losing interest in your wife. You will find your satisfaction elsewhere, and you will not really, really have a blessed marriage. You can’t. So, if you just remove this fence, say, I don’t want to honor God’s word, I don’t want to be pure, then, well, what’s going to happen is that all these things will come into your life, and you will soon have a broken marriage. Again, Josh McDowell in 2019 he says, “If you marry someone who watches pornography, you can kiss your intimacy goodbye. Because there’s not a woman in Singapore that can compete with porn.” Just can’t. Now, just in case you think that, “Oh, it sounds like sex is a very bad thing.” Well, no, that’s not what God says. “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” [Hebrews 13:4].  Sex is a wonderful thing in marriage. God’s plan, God’s will, God’s blessing is in marriage. Sex is where you express deep intimacy in marriage, where you express deep generosity to give yourself for your spouse in marriage. It’s a picture of great ecstasy, that joy between Christ and the church in the future. I had a whole sermon on sex, but you got to Google it, if you want to. You have to google Gospel Light or Pastor Jason, “Focus on the Family Sex”, and there’s a YouTube there, but I won’t have much more time to say except that sex is a great thing. It’s not a dirty word, but it is only true in marriage. In marriage, sex is like a warm fire. In a fireplace. You know, fire in a fireplace is good. It gives heating to the entire house when it’s in winter. It’s a beautiful thing. Sex is great. Fire is great when it is in the right place, but when it gets out of the fireplace like what we see here, then it ruins everything. Then your life will be riddled with guilt and shame and fear. You will ruin your own life. You will be addicted to it. You will lose intimacy with your spouse, you will start objectifying people, and you will not have enough, and you will go on to commit actual crimes and harden your heart against God. The ramifications are severe.

It’s almost again, like another picture I would like to give you. It’s like a river. A river is good, nothing wrong with that. It channels waters to the right places, but when the waters overflow the river banks, then it starts to destroy homes and civilizations. And so, sex in a proper channel is a beautiful thing, but once it runs over the banks, it destroys everything. So, this is what we are seeking to protect your marriage.

The Role of the Law and the Gospel

The first thing therefore, I’d like to say to you is that this is a good command, a gracious command. It is to protect you. God is not a kill joy, as he has already said in Deuteronomy 5, “Oh, that they had such a heart as this always, to fear me and to keep all my commandments, that it might go well with them.” You disregard God’s word at your own peril. This is our Creator, the giver of life, the giver of marriage, and His instructions are clear. The second thing I’d like us to know about “You shall not commit adultery” is that this is a kind of preparation. What do you mean by preparation? Well, you know the story, the Evil Queen stands before the magic mirror and says, “Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who’s the fairest of them all?” And she loves to hear the mirror says, “Oh, it is, you, dear queen, you are the fairest of them all.” She loves to hear that from the mirror. Every day she wants to hear that, until one day, standing before the same magic mirror, the mirror says “It is not you, but it is Snow White.” The Queen heard something she did not want to hear. What if there is a mirror today that tells you the exact truth, but it is not what you want to hear. We don’t like to hear what we don’t like to hear. We like to hear sweet things. Oh, how smart you are, how great you are, how kind you are, how good you are, but there is a mirror who tells you exactly the truth, and you won’t like it. And the mirror is the Bible, the Word of God, God’s law. The reason why we are looking at the 10 Commandments is because it is a true reflection of you and me. That we are not fair, we are not beautiful, but we are ugly, we are sinful, we are dirty. Just last week, we looked at “You shall not kill.” Before we think about this, we thought we are very nice people. We are kind to others. We would never kill. But when we understood what God meant by “You shall not kill”, I understand I’m a murderer. I murder with my lips. I murder with my mouth. I murder in my heart, I hate people. I have borne hatred and bitterness within my soul, and I know I’m a killer. And today, as we look at the seventh commandment, I don’t think there’s any one of us here who will walk out and say, “I’m absolutely pure.” But I’m dirty, I’m lustful, I am adulterous, I am unfaithful.

The law reveals my sin. Some of you may say, “Oh, let me try harder, and maybe, if I quit porn, if I quit this affair, maybe I can get to heaven. I’m saying to you, please don’t jump to that conclusion, because the law is not given to tell you to try harder to save yourself. The law is telling you, you can never save yourself. Because there is no one who can keep this law perfectly his or her whole life. But the law is given to redirect you. The law shows you your ugliness and tells you that you cannot do and give what God demands. What God demands is perfect, sinless, righteousness. None of us can do that. The Law condemns us, but the law redirects us to the cross, to Calvary, to where Jesus died, because on the cross He paid it all. The law God demanded righteousness, and the cross provided righteousness. It’s on the cross where Jesus died to save sinners, to save murderers, to save adulterers like you and me. Isn’t this the narrative of the Bible? “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? So, the Bible is clear. Who will enter the kingdom the righteous, because the unrighteous won’t. Who are the unrighteous? Just in case you’re wondering. The sexually immoral, the idolaters, the adulterers and men who practice homosexuality. [1 Corinthians 6:9] These are the unrighteous things we do that disqualifies us from the kingdom of heaven. But the Bible goes on to say, “And such were some of you” [1 Corinthians 6:11]. You know, what’s the key word here? “Were”, “were”, “were.” There’s something that has changed. Last time you were now you aren’t. Why? Because you are washed, you are sanctified. You are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, and by the Spirit of our God. You see, this is the beauty of the Christian faith. Someone has done for you, what you cannot do.

It’s not you wash yourself, you can’t, but Jesus shed his blood on the cross to wash you. We are not telling you to do self-help, to do some moral work, because we can’t. Jesus did it all. And those who repent of their sin and believe in Jesus Christ, they are washed. They are sanctified. Means they are set apart. They are justified, means God sees them as innocent, guiltless. Because Jesus paid for them, and His spirit has come into their lives to change them and to grow them. And so there is this interesting saying Jesus gave, “Truly. I say to you”, who is the you here? The religious leaders, the religious leaders who memorize the Bible, who keep all the minutiae of the laws, keeping tithes and so on. Jesus says to them, these religious folks who think that they are ahead of the curve, who think that they are the best of the best. Jesus said, “…the tax collectors and the prostitutes go into the kingdom of God before you” [Matthew 21:1]. Why? aren’t these the religious leaders? Yes, but the religious leaders rely on themselves. They pride themselves that they are the goody two shoes, when actually their hearts are wicked. They think they can earn God’s favor with their own self-righteous works. But Jesus says no. Who are the ones who will be saved? The tax collectors and the prostitutes. Why? Because they are the ones who admit their sin, who know that they cannot make it on their own, and who will come to me, the friend of sinners to wash away their sins.

You might be a very religious person. You might be saying, I’ve been in church for the past 20 years of my life, I’ve always given in the offering box. I’ve always been praying, I should be the one going to heaven, right? Well, only if you really rely on Jesus Christ to save you from your sins. But if you think Christianity is just a religion like anything else, every other religion that you earn your way to heaven, you are wrong. Someone today who might have just gone to the prostitute last night come in this morning and hear this truth, the good news preached, and believe in it. This person comes into the Kingdom before you. Because he relies not on himself, but on Jesus. But at the same time, I want to tell you that this man who went to the prostitute last night and who comes in and believes in Jesus, He will not stay the same way as he was last night, because the Holy Spirit will come into his life and change him, and he will want to live a pure life. But that is not the basis of his salvation. The basis of his salvation is Jesus on the cross. So I want to say to you that if someone like Rahab can be saved, you can be saved. Rahab was a prostitute and she can be saved. So the law is a preparation. This Seventh Commandment is a preparation, preparation for what? Preparation for us to come to Christ. Don’t forget that the 10 Commandments are preparations for us to come to the gospel.

Now I want to say a word to all my brothers and sisters in Christ. If the statistics are right, at least 50% of us here view pornography, not to mention some may even be in affairs. It’s hidden. It’s unknown. Maybe today you are filled with guilt, shame and fear. The whole sermon, you’ve been like this. [Pastor hanging down his head] Don’t dare to look at me. Either you’re sleeping or you’re guilty, this is so boring. But I want to say, if you truly belong to Jesus, your sins do not define you. Christ does. I am not in any way saying that it is fine to sin, but I am saying your sins do not define you. Christ does. And when Jesus died on the cross, He died for even the sins that you are committing last night. And it is this goodness of God that should lead us to repentance. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And I think God is still extending his arms out wide, saying, Come back home. Quit robbing yourself of my true blessings for you in marriage and come back home.

Practical Steps to Overcome Sexual Immorality

The final thing I want to say about this commandment is, how can we really fulfill it? The practice of fulfilling this commandment, I do not want to be long on diagnosis and short on solution. So what is the cure? What is the solution? How can you and I. I’m speaking now to Christians, all right, how can you and I break free from immorality in our lives? I want to say, first of all, I say this to Christians, because I think only Christians can really break free from this sin. That’s my position. Because if you’re not a Christian, you’re always going to be a slave of sin. You have no choice. But now that you are a Christian, I think you can break free from sin, because God has given you a new life. You are dead with Christ and risen with him in the resurrection. Romans 6 truth – I have a new position. I’m no more obligated to sin. I’m no more obligated to be a slave to sin. Number two, the reason why only Christians can break free from sin is because now God has given us a new passion, a new love, the love of God, the love of the Father, so that even when no one is watching, I won’t want to watch pornography, because God loves me and I love him. There’s a new love that drives those lusts out, not automatically, but there is this expulsive power of a new affection, a new love for God. And thirdly, the reason why only Christians can fight this sin is not just because you have a new position, a new passion, but you have a new power. The Holy Spirit of God lives in you. So, if you today are addicted to sin, the solution is that you must be born again. The solution is that you must come to Jesus, so that Christ lives in you. So, who can break free? Christians – true, born-again followers of Jesus Christ. How do you break away from sin? Let me give you a few words as we wrap up.

Number one, you’ve got to flee. This is biblical. We see examples of that. When Joseph fled from Potiphar’s wife, Joseph was a handsome man, looked like Chow Yun Fat? I do not know, but he had to run away from Potiphar’s wife because she wanted to lie with him. But Joseph refused to do so. He knew God and didn’t want to sin against God. And I think that is that number one principle we need to learn. If you want to fight or you want to be free from sexual immorality, it has got to be a whole life of fleeing. You got to avoid temptations. It is also given in the Proverbs – “Keep your way far from her…”, the seductress. In Proverbs 5:8, “…do not go near the door of the house.” Don’t even come near. And I think this applies in a very practical way, like as in, you quit your job, stay away from your office, block her number from your phone, no more messaging. It might mean cancel that subscription on Netflix, or put in filters in your computer, or don’t use computer at home unless only in the public corners or public spaces in your house. It might mean painful things, because the key here is to flee sexual immorality. You have to run from it. It’s too strong for any one of us to waddle in into any sexual temptation and say, I’m strong enough to fight it. No, wisdom is stay as far as you can from these things. And actually, the words of our Lord tells us the same reality. He tells us, If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out, if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off. Now, of course, he is not saying this in a literal sense. This is a picture lesson, because even if you take out your right eye, you still have left eye. You cut off your right hand you still have left hand. And moreover, the source of sin is not in your hand or eye, it’s in your heart. So what Jesus is saying is not literally go to the surgeon, but he’s telling you to do something that is radical, decisive and even painful. It might really be cutting off some female colleagues or male colleagues that you have been chatting a lot on. It might mean, as I’ve mentioned, plucking out your devices. Flee. That’s the idea. Billy Graham had a rule he would not be with a single woman in a private meeting. That’s his principle. I guess this would apply also for young couples who want to travel overseas alone. It might also mean, have implications for those who say, I want to date for very long before I get married, you might be subjecting yourself to temptations. The whole idea here is, in whatever circumstance, if you really want to keep pure, you’ve got to learn to flee, avoid temptations.

Number two. Even if we try to flee from every kind of temptation, there will still be temptations that come. Then what do you do? You surf Facebook, you have already blocked off those pictures, but they still come. What do you do? Well when they come, when another colleague comes, when another neighbor comes, when another friend comes, and you enter into a kind of temptation, another image comes. What do you do? Well, you have tried to flee, but it comes. Then I say to you the second word?

Very good, you fight. And when we say fight, I don’t mean you punch your colleague, but I think it means fight spiritually. And I think what it means to fight spiritually is that you do it on your knees. You do it in prayer. The old writers, the Puritans, like to call this concept the mortification of sin, the killing of sin. And the killing of sin is not you yourself killing sin, but you calling on God to kill sin because you have no power to kill sin. God has, and you practically do this by praying. And I think I want to express or draw out for you, break down the steps, exactly what it means to be praying, fighting on your knees by giving you these four letters. I’ve shared this a few times – A, B, C, D. Fighting sin is like A, B, C, D. Number one. You, “A”, you acknowledge, acknowledge, what? Acknowledge, I can’t do this. Most people fail here because they think they are so spiritual they can fight sin on their own. That’s where you collapse. You start with recognizing that the flesh is weak. You start by saying, “I need to realize I’ve got to depend on God.” So, you go to “B” and “B” is, believe. Believe what? Believe that God can do it. God can free me from this sin. We can pray. Then number three, “C” to call on God, “Lord help me.” Matthew 6:13: “…lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.” And then “D” is when you actually do it. You actually stop, you block, you leave. You do not engage in conversation. But you got to do you’re ABCs before you do that which is necessary. I think that’s how we fight. And you pray till that desire releases its grip on your heart.

The third “F” I’d like to share. Now these two are when there is war time, the attacks come, right? But there are also peace times when you don’t have these attacks. So what do you do? You learn to strengthen yourself. I think the third “F” is fortify, not Spotify, Fortify. Fortify in that we remember Psalm 119:9 – “How can a young man cleanse his way?” The Bible says, “By taking heed according to your word.” So when you are not fighting these sins, you’ve got to be diligent in growing in God’s word. And it’s the same – “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” [Psalm 119:11] So are you someone who is a sin addict? And I tell you, you’re likely someone who is not in the Word. Now, I’m not saying that because you’re in the word, you’re always immune, but I think if you’re in the word, it helps you against sin, and if you’re in sin, it doesn’t help you in the word. It’s contradictory. They’re mutually exclusive, and the more I hide God’s word in my heart, the better my defense will be. So I really encourage God’s people today. It’s not just psychotherapy you need. It’s the word of God. It’s sanctification, it’s spiritual growth, it’s Christ likeness, it’s maturity that helps you fight sin. You need to fortify.

The Importance of Community and Accountability

Number four. You need to flee, fight, fortify, very easy. And the next one, sure, “F” one.  Number four. Very good, Community, yes, Community. So can you give me, it cannot be FFF and C. So, the word is…? Fellowship, that’s right. Hebrews 3:13 tells us that we are to “…exhort one another so that we are not hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.” So God’s plan is for the church, the Body of Christ, to encourage one another so that we do not get hardened. He repeats this again in Hebrews 10:24, “…consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.” And then we just finish the series. In James 5:16, we are to confess our sins, one to another and pray for one another. This is not about the absolution of sin. This is about helping one another, giving accountability, providing love and support so that we do not allow our sins to be festering in the dark. And that’s why people need friends, spiritual friends, accountability groups, discipleship groups, and people go to counselors because they are so desperate they need someone to keep them accountable and to encourage them, and so let me also do a promo for “Bak Chor Mee”. “Bak Chor Mee” is our biblical counseling ministry. Please don’t be so carnal. It’s a biblical counseling ministry. It’s to help you, and the issue is not small, but we all need that community, that fellowship.

And lastly, I say fulfill. And it is true, but in the sense that you are to fulfill the needs of your spouse. First, Corinthians 7:5, the first few verses speak about the need to fulfill your spouse. You may not have that sexual desire and need at that point of time, but it’s not just about you. Remember, marriage is about intimacy and generosity, how you serve each other with your body. Because you do not want your spouse to slip into sin, and that is a necessary duty, and that’s why you need to cultivate intimacy, love and relationship, so that you are not opening yourself up to all kinds of sin. Well, I could say a lot, but you can check our past sermons.

I just want to end off with saying. You shall not commit adultery. It’s not a kill joy. And I want to remind you the three levels of sin in murder and how there are three levels in this commandment too. Level one, physical adultery in the bed. Level two, mental adultery in your head and in someone else’s head. Level three. If level three of the six commandment “Thou shall not kill”, is to give your life, sacrifice yourself for the good of your neighbor, then I think level three for the seventh commandment is to sacrifice, give yourself, devote yourself to your spouse, so that you may portray Jesus and the Church. The Seventh Commandment lived out to the max is when people see your marriage and realize it’s like how Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her.

I don’t have time. Let me close in prayer. Father, thank You for this gracious command, may sinners take heed to repent and believe, and may your church grow up and honor you and honor our marriages for your glory. Thank you that though our sins are many, your mercy is more. We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.